what the fuck is with everything being white when I post it I mean wtf really

Oh god another one.

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

Ehhhh, I guess? Along with being in a long term relationship, I also have some more-than-friends feelings for some people, but they're not really "crushes". It's more like "I want to be super close to you and be able to be super weird and lovey and shit without freaking you out" kind of thing. Like. Best friends leveled up. Or something. I've wanted to tell them but at the same time, I don't want to make things awkward, weird, etc. or have them take it the wrong way. Mike understands though and he's completely okay with it which is great.

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

Yeah, twice. The first time was with my ex -- I believed I was really in love and I suppose I was. I did love him with all of my heart. When he left me (even though he had been "trailing off" in the relationship for a few months, to where I was almost "over it" by the time it happened) a little piece of me died. A bit later I got together with my current boyfriend and it's like he gave a little piece back to fit where the other went missing. I feel like every love you have takes a bit away, and each one gives a little bit as well. You're always with one another even if you're no longer together, in a sense.

3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?

My current one. It will be four years in June, 2014.

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

I am working on changing. I have a very, very bad anger issue along with severe depression, severe anxiety, and paranoia (amongst other issues). My anger and jealousy is what I'm working on -- I tend to snap over small things and though it's usually in response to what he does, it doesn't make it okay and it doesn't make anything better. He freaks out when he thinks I'm angry at him so he gets defensive. We're both working on things. We want to be together for the long run so it's necessary we do this.

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

Eh, decent? I haven't talked to him for a few months

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

Ehhhhh, yeah. Twice. And that is why I no longer have contact with those people. Neither were serious relationships, but I did have some form of lovey feelings for them. I'm not assuming that they didn't return those feelings, but they certainly did things that I will never forgive them for. My first "boyfriend" and my first "girlfriend" both cheated.

7: Have you ever cheated?

No.

8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?

No. Why put myself in a position that I know will only bring hurt?

9: What's the most important part of a relationship?

Trust and communication. If you can't communicate with one another you may as well break up because things will most definitely get bad as soon as you start to have issues with one another in any way, shape, or form. Trust you need because there will be times when you aren't together. You cannot (feasibly) be together 24/7 (I mean I suppose you could but holy fuck) so...yeah. If you're going to think that your spouse/SO is cheating on you every time they leave your sight, why are you even bothering staying with them? You're only hurting you both, especially if you accuse them.

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

Serious. 

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

Ehhh...breaking up for a short period of time? In all honesty, no. I don't believe in doing it. I would personally never go on a "break", because to me it feels like they're testing the waters with someone else to see how it'll go before completely breaking up with me -- therefore keeping me on the line. Now, taking time apart to be alone a bit, but still being in a relationship? Hell yeah. I know that as much as I love Mike I don't want to be around him literally all of the time. I need me time, too.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

I've never hooked up lmao

13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

Not telling him I loved him more often. Not telling him how much he means to me. How much he still means to me and how much I still love him (albeit no longer in a romantic way). I wish we could be closer again because he's wonderful, but I would completely understand his reasons for not wanting to (if there are any).

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

My honest opinion? When you're a legal adult. 18. I haven't even had sex yet and I'm a few years older than that. Maybe it's because I'm apathetically asexual, or just old-timey, but...yeh. Most legal adults don't even understand the risks and implications of sex. Throwing some teenage horomones into the mix isn't making anything any better. But hey, if you want to do it, you can, but just be sure to keep yourself SAFE, use a condom, birth control pill, etc etc. Don't rely on the pull-out method or think "I don't need to be careful, it won't happen to me". You're an idiot if you think it won't happen to you. Also, get tested for STDs/have your partner get tested if you've had multiple partners and think something is wrong. Basically, fucking educate yourself before doing anything. And last of all -- make sure you actually want to do it. Don't do it because they want you to. Don't do it because you're afraid they'll leave you if you don't. That isn't okay and you're better off without them if that's how it's going to be.

15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?

Eh. Yes and no. Typically relationships with huge age gaps don't work because there is a very very steep maturity difference and to be honest I kind of question it whenever I see a 25 year old dating, say, a 16 year old. I can't think of many things that they could have in common because they are in totally different stages of their lives. To those who have had that work out for them, though: good for you. I just know I wouldn't date someone more than a few years my senior or junior.

16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?

No -- I mean -- you can love how someone acts and looks by watching them but that doesn't mean you know the true person behind that face. In order to really love someone, you need to get to know them.

17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?

Oh, definitely. I met both my ex and my current boyfriend online. Both were/are wonderful relationships. I'm still with my current boyfriend (obviously lmao) and we moved in together in the summer of 2013. We're in our own apartment and things are going rather well.

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

Homophobia, transphobia, bible-thumper, racism, being an asshole, being allergic to dogs and/or cats (I have to have animals -- they're a security thing for my anxiety and I'm just an animal lover), hatred of any group of people in general

19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?

Whenever you don't have feelings or don't think your declining amount of feelings can be saved. Don't drag something on if you don't want to put work into fixing it or don't think it can be fixed. Also, if you're screaming at and hitting one another every damn day (or hitting ever, really, unless you're into that, but that's different) it's either time for a breakup or some professional help.

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

Dammit I've only mentioned that several fucking times. Yes.

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

Definitely! My ex and I are still friends, though we don't talk too often anymore.

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

Hahah I'd be a fucking hypocrite if I said no. All of my exes have been my friends at some point in time. Some just worked out better than others.

23: How many relationships have you had?

Eh, well. It's kind of hard to judge. I consider myself to have had two "real" relationships, one "serious" relationship, and two short-term relationships that were there just to...be there? I guess? To test the waters. I was pretty young whenever those happened so I can't say they were super-serious but they did help me figure out who I was and what I wanted in a relationship.

24: Do you think love can last forever?

Oh, yeah. There's more than just romantic love. There's the love of a pet, or of a family member, or a friend. Love can most certainly last forever in any form. It just takes work.

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

In a sense...yeah? But physically, no. Does that make sense?

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?

Nah fuck that. I don't live with either of them and they don't have a say of what goes on in my personal life. As long as I'm being treated well and I'm happy, then I'll be with who I want to be with. That's not to say that they can't voice their opinions - they can - but it won't really sway my thoughts or feelings on my SO.

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

Stop chasing her. You'll find a couple of good guys. She's not worth it.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

Yes. Mike and I were in a long distance relationship for three years before moving in together this past summer. We only saw one another during summer, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and sometimes spring break, but it all varied. Some times I wouldn't see him for several months, while other times I'd see him a few times in a few months.

29: What do you notice first about another person?

Physically, their height/weight, their smile, their eyes, their face in general. Then once I start to see them interact, their personality and humor.

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

It's complicated, hah. I'm panromantic, "apathetically" asexual, andddd a transman. Though I haven't done anything to actually transition at this point in time. I will, however, be binding myself and all that shit. As far as I'm concerned, I am a man. And that's okay.

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

Honestly, that really depends. I have depression, anxiety, paranoia, anger issues, OCD, and I may develop schizophrenia in the future. It wouldn't really bother me unless it became a huge strain on the relationship that they were unwilling to try and aid.

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

Yes.

33: Do you want to get married one day?

I'm not opposed to the thought.

34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?

I think it's really fucking stupid.

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

I have been for three and a half years

36: Are you still a virgin?

Yes

37: What's more important: Looks or personality?

Neither outweighs the other, but you have to be attractive to me. That's all that matters if you want to be with me.

38: Do you enjoy love films?

Not particularly

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

I would anonymously send my best friend(s) (this happened in different schools in different states) a rose/a card each Valentine's Day through the school with a letter saying what I loved about them. I have never gotten roses or letters, however, except for like one time in elementary school whenever someone wrote down that they loved me. Ah, young love. Never found out who that was lmao

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

Mike's birthday is Valentine's Day he's literally my Valentine

41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?

Let's fucking play Borderlands or something and eat chicken and fries and maybe some pizza and scream and yell and swear like pirates and maybe afterwards we can lay together on the couch and watch Mythbusters

42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?

I was required to in high school

43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?

They're both important to me for different reasons. There are things I would do for my partner that I wouldn't do for a friend, but there are also things I would do for a friend that I wouldn't necessarily do for a partner. There are very few things, though. I feel like putting either on a level above the other is just kind of gross and in a sense, wrong. Like. Yeah. I would be crushed if Mike and I split up but I'd also be crushed if a friend and I were no longer friends. It's really difficult to explain.

44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?

I fuckin' can be but I'm usually not

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

Sure, why the hell not. There are actually two that I could see myself being with even if for only a short period of time. Doesn't mean I'm going to run away from Mike and scoop them up into my arms though

46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?

I fucking hate that term and anyone who uses it seriously. You are not being "friendzoned". If someone does not like you in that way, it is not because you are friends with them. It is because they do not like you in that way.

47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?

I don't even know who's dating who's famous what

48: What's your favorite love song?

idk if you'd classify it as a love song but I love "Only Wanna Be With You" by Hootie and the Blowfish

49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

Probably.

50: If you're single, why do you think you are?

Not single. If I was it would be because either I couldn't find someone or I just wanted to be single. It could also be because I'm a pre-op, pre-full-transition transman and...not many people want to date someone like me. Or would even think about being with someone like me. Especially because of mental issues on my end. There could be many reasons that I'm not going to get into.

51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?

"Nice guy" or actual nice guy b/c that wording is overused by people who also believe in "friendzoning". I'd rather be happy in a relationship but the second time around if nothing works out I'm marrying for money /s

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

I would consider me to be good at it, yes.

53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?

No.

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?

I think it's kind of nice to be able to tell the world THIS PERSON IS MINE AND I LOVE THEM YEAH and just show you and them are no longer available and that you're now a thing. Idk. It's not really super important but it's nice to have it out there.

55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?

I am clingy and jealous, yes. I try not to be though.

56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?

I did try to get someone to leave their relationship because they were being abused and manipulated. However, she went back to her because she "loved her" even though the girlfriend would say she'd kill herself if she (girl I tried to get away from her) would ever talk to anyone else. Ever. But I found out that they were both really fucking shitty people at the time. So...yeah. :u

57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

If you're already damaged then a broken heart isn't going to help it. If you want to kill yourself over a breakup then it's likely that you wanted to kill yourself beforehand and that it was just the tipping point. However, someone with no prior mental illness who dates someone for a month and then is dumped going off and stating they're going to kill themselves? Yeah, you're gross, stop.

58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?

Dominant. Very, very dominant.

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?

His birthday is fucking Valentine's Day how could I forget that. Also our anniversary is June 22nd. And I like the number 22. And it's in the middle of the year. It's easy. Gosh.

60: What's your opinion on open relationships?

I would not get into one with my current relationship...or...with any dude? But I feel like I could be in an open relationship with a female. I dunno. I'm fucking weird, I guess.

61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?

Once I'm married my partner will be my family. I will have created my own family. But in general, it really depends. I don't have a great relationship with much of my family but if my mom needed me to move back in with her to help her for however long, I would do it as long as I could find a job there (or if she was willing to support me, but depending on the situation that may not be possible). I would likely drag my SO along with me to help, though, if at all possible.

62: How do you define "cheating"?

Well, see, that's kind of hard. Obviously having any sort of sexual relationship with anyone other than your SO (unless it's an open relationship and you're following that relationship's rules) is a big one. Other things include like...flirting with someone, even. Sending undertones. Having that emotional bond with someone other than your spouse. Yeah, you can have strong emotional bonds with friends, and you can flirt with friends (god knows I do that all of the time), but there is a difference between being playful with someone you've known for a long time and not being serious, and hitting on someone. Mike is 100% okay with my flirting though. He'll even tell me what to say sometimes.

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

Iffff you're in a relationship with me I will expect you to not watch porn unless we decide on something together. To me it's a form of cheating. If you don't like that, then don't date me. But if you're not dating me then you have no say in the matter. \o/ 

I also think porn is disgusting. Drawn porn doesn't bother me for some reason but videos and pictures of people do. Maybe because drawn porn is fantasy while pictures and videos aren't? But I still don't want you looking at any of them in a sexual manner.

64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?

I don't really celebrate Valentine's Day in the first place. It's also Mike's birthday. And I also don't need a special day to show him that he's special to me, because I can do that any fuckin' time I want.

65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?

Eh, sometimes. I am the big spoon. Big spoooon.